Company Christmas Party DO’S & DO NOT’S

Better late than never, right?

DO:

  1. Wear a super revealing dress. You know, leave nothing to the imagination.
  2. Bring your dog (at least dress him in a nice sweater.)
  3. Bring like seven people. Show up and yell “SQUAD” as loud as possible.
  4. Definitely get hammered.
  5. Get your dog hammered.
  6. Tell everybody how much you love the ‘Lardassians.’
  7. Scream “I WON!” after every drawing… even though you definitely didn’t.
  8. Flirt with your boss, always turns out well the following Monday.
  9. Eat ALL THE FOOD. All of it. Ask your boss for tupperware for the rest.
  10. Trash talk your boss after flirting to your co-workers.
  11. Post all your co-workers every move on social media
  12. Make it into a karaoke party. You got this, girl.
  13. Dance like nobody is watching. Seriously.
DO NOT:
  1. Regret anything
  2. Or take my advice, ever.
And for your viewing pleasure, I have added photos of my recent company holiday party. And yes, I dressed my dog in a nice holiday sweater.
Dress: @missguided
Belt: @missguided
Shoes: @valentino
Watch: @michaelkors
Photography: @chelseapatriciaphoto
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Dress @Missguided | Starring Nugget’s Ass.
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Dress @Missguided | Belt @ Missguided | Shoes @Valentino
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Shoes @Valentino
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Shoes @Valentino
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Getting Ready
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Pregame @Moet #vintage
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Pregame @Moet #vintage

How to deal with cuffin’ season being single.

Be naughty, save Santa the trip. 


 

Cuffin’ Season: The season almost every human being on the planet ‘cuffs’ themselves to a significant other for the holidays.. blah, blah.

You know the second you walk into Thanksgiving or Christmas you are going to have to endure an invasion of questions about babies, significant others and why you insist on living at home alone with your cat. I have a few tips. If you’re single during the holiday season and sick of seeing people getting engaged on social media, getting married and having babies:

Step One: Crawl under the covers

Step Two: Stay there

Just kidding. But in all reality, my defense mechanism is to divert the conversation to bunnies, or unicorns.

If you are like me, you can also do my go-to. Stuff a large amount of food in your mouth and just nod at them until they go away. I also will point out the fact that I already have a child, even though he is ten years old, 12 pounds and covered in fur who are you to judge? It totally counts.

Good Vibes Only,

XO Brandi

Holy Selena

So can we please talk about Selena at the #VSFS? Holy sexual. And yes, I know I’m a little behind. So, I’ve added some links at the bottom on some cheats to get the strappy front of any top or dress you want! 

 

Good Vibes Only,

XO Brandi

9 Gifts to get literally nobody, ever.

Unless you’re into this sorta thing.

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In case you love pizza, but also Christmas
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Who wants a shitty nights’ sleep?
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Wut.
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Because bacon cat.
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I’m sure you ravers will love this though…. it will match those ridiculous fur boots.
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Cat Nirvana. That is all.
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Who even has an iPhone 5 anymore?
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#harrypotterforlife
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For all you grammar correctors out there… You’re welcome. FYI yes, correctors is a word.

If you’re EXTREMELY strange and want a shirt with Albert Einstein on acid, feel free to get all of the above merch at rageon.com

… Which, I unfortunately will not be visiting again anytime soon.

I’m a weirdo, don’t get me wrong. But I think this is a new low.

 

Who made boujee a word?

First post; no pressure. Basically I went out and bought a waterfall trench coat and decided I could definitely write a fashion blog… But all jokes aside. I’ve been in and out of the fashion industry for years and it’s always been my passion. Oh, and good food is kind of my thing…. and dogs, and, well, anything that has to do with consuming alcoholic beverages for that matter. That being said I’m not a ‘cool girl.’ I can’t shoot whiskey and I’m not going to drink a beer just because we are at a baseball game. I’m going to walk out of my way to find somewhere with vodka, or wine. So boujee, I know. Enough about booze.. So, my dog is pretty awesome. When I first got him I decided to name him “Pucci Mane” you know, after Gucci Mane. People started spelling and pronouncing it wrong so needless to say things got really weird, really fast. I then named him Nugget, because I happen to be craving chicken nuggets at the time and the similarities between the two were uncanny. So, my little Nugget, AKA Sir Nugglesworth, AKA Nuggy Butt, and AKA Shithead (when neccesary) is my world. My mom has a bunch of fur grandchildren to look forward to, not real life grandchildren.. #nope #nope and more #nope. Anyway, I think i’m funny which is all that matters I guess.. so I plan on posting cool, hilarious stuff along with some fashion and food thrown in (you know, for good measure)

Oh, and PS it’s Britney Spears’ birthday. So, make sure to write some creepy instagram comments on her page to remind her we are all pretty much her stalkers fo’ lyfe.

Good Vibes Only,

XO Brandi

Daisies